Since starting this blog oh so many years ago, I haven’t really held back.
I have pretty much made my life an open book on the internet – detailing for you guys the good times and the bad times - not just with food but with everything.
I reflected on the illness of my paternal grandmother and her passing. I told you all when my grandfather passed away, and when Parrish lost his father. Losing a loved one is never easy, but writing about here always seemed to help.
But something changed when I became pregnant. I started to feel…..closed. I didn’t want to overload you guys with daily pregnancy news, and in putting on that filter, I noticed myself leaving more and more of my daily details off the blog. And while I never intentionally hid anything, the past few weeks have left me feeling less than genuine.
Sunday night I lost my last grandparent. My maternal grandmother – my mama – left behind her broken and damaged shell and claimed her heavenly spot. It was one of the saddest and happiest moments in my life.
Sad because I lost an incredible force in my life. Happy because her suffering was over and because I know without a doubt that she was ready to go. Sad because Baby Ravelli won’t get to meet his Great Mama, but happy because of the great Christian legacy that she left behind for him.
My Mama was one of the sweetest people I know, second only to my own mother, who learned from the best. She loved her family and more than that, she loved Christ.
She is the most faithful person I know. She wore her faith on the outside; It was in everything and everyone she touched. She prayed without hesitation – it didn’t matter where she was or who was witnessing, if she felt moved to talk to God she did.
She touched your leg when she laughed. It didn’t matter how far away you were sitting, she laughed with her whole heart and touching you was part of it. She cared for her grandkids, and I’m lucky to call myself one. She loved you unconditionally, but she wasn’t going to sugar coat the facts. She was trustworthy beyond measure, and she made hands down the BEST hotdog chili.
She was loved by so many, and I know that I’m not the only one anticipating the day when I get to see her again. When she meets me in heaven, with those sparkling blue eyes, and we both get to tell Jesus that she is one of the main reasons that I’m there.
All my love. Amen.